I find your lack of yeast disturbing

Now then, here’s the thing. A new thing. If you would rather listen to me than read me. Yes? Then just click HERE and the magic will begin.

What to say this week?

I could tell you about Freddie…

(Hello Freddie) or Freddy – I never did ask. I tend to gravitate towards Freddie with an IE. I suppose because of Freddie Ljungberg, but Fredd(y/ie) supports Tottenham so…. who knows? As irony would have it, Alanis, we met watching an Arsenal game on my birthday (not against Tottenham I should add) and it turns out Freddie is also a ‘yes man’ like myself. Living in Ipswich, but on realising he’s never seen the white cliffs of Dover set off to visit by himself. Whilst in Kent decided he’d book into a hotel in Canterbury and head to a pub to watch the football. And two ‘yes men’ in the same place typically turns into a long evening, which was a perfect birthday outing for me. Thanks Freddie.

…. but I won’t. Or about building a pizza oven in the back garden with my dad, breaking down on the M23, signing up for Beachbody on Demand, camping at Bodiam, or my emotions following Avengers: Infinity War. But again, I won’t…. I’d like to try and talk about Star Wars. Sorry, actually I’m not sorry, I’m British.

A long time ago in a bakery far, far way….

So ‘The Last Jedi’ has already been released on dvd.

Sorry, quick aside – do you remember Blockbuster? If you do, then you’ll be pleased to hear that apparently everything is going to be ok as the ‘Magic of Blockbuster Video lives on with Dish’. No? me neither. What’s that Luke? ‘Impressive. Every word in that sentence was wrong.’ OK. Sorry, sorry – whilst we’re here, Blockbusters? Ooh, and that leads us nicely to Ian Dury and the Blockheads.  Hit me with your rythym stick. Hit me slowly. Hit me quick. Hit me. Sorry.

And that is enough unapologetic sorrying. Before being British, I am essentially just energy. (NRG. I wonder what other words can you spell with just letters?) They used to say everything is made up of matter, but it’s energy now. Can’t keep up with these things.

Let’s get back on track… Official Star War’s Day, May the 4th, has also come and gone. But it doesn’t matter, I’m going to make Star Wars references anyway. And to tie(fighter) it back to a more bread related  theme, did you know there is a kind of bread called ‘Obi Non’?  A flatbread popular in Afghan and Uzbek cuisine similar to a naan bread! Who knew?

Honestly, I’ve now forgotten the point. It was going to be something about light and dark, balance and the force. Luck, chance, and looking for significance in the insignificant.

Them an Obi Wan Kenobi quote ‘In my experience there is no such thing as luck.” Followed by a book I’m reading:

And whilst we’re here, the other book I’ve also got on the go…

 

Thanks 

Matt Fell, for suggesting when I write my biography I call it ‘Dave: Useful but not Necessary’

Dan, for towing my car and family back from Gatwick in the middle of the night.

Jefff, for both being a helpful employee of Go Outdoors, and for being called Jefff with 3 fs. I suppose really I should be thanking parents.

And Caleb, for introducing me to ASMR eating sounds. It’s a whole world of weird I never knew existed!

 

Lexiconomy 

It’s been a while since I included a list. So here’s a list of things I did not like as a child, that I have since checked to see if I now like them as an adult…

  • Liver
  • Smashing Pumpkins
  • Oasis
  • Knitted jumpers
  • Dentists
  • Reloading the dishwasher

… I don’t.

 

 

Let’s play.

Google Feud?

All you have to do is guess the top 10 suggestions from the Google search autocomplete for particular words or phrases. For example, they might say Natalie, and to win you would have to guess the following surnames. You would then realise that they are all older than you with the exception of Natalie Alyn Lind, who you’ve never heard of before, taking you on a journey of creative optimism followed by ‘all change’ despair that you are yet acheive anything that a Natalie can do. It’s all in the name. I mean it would have been a brave choice to call your firstborn son Natalie… but it would have set up me for life. Thanks mum and dad. Oh well.

gsearch

 

Boggle Wordsearch?

Inspired by the laziest wordsearch I’ve ever seen (as below), which included only conjunctions, I realised the only lazier option would be a Boggle wordsearch, where you try to find the words in the ‘Boggle grid’ from an already played list of answers. Invite yourself around, and we can play a few rounds.

 

Outtakes 

‘Bake. Or bake not. There is no try.’

‘I’ll never turn to the dark rye side. You’ve failed, your highness. I am a ciabatta, like my father before me.’

‘I’m one with the flour. The flour is with me.’

‘These aren’t the breads you’re looking for…’

 

 

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